Saturday, February 26, 2011

the pact ~ a review

alert : this post contains an individual perception towards a thing and please be reminded that human perceptions differ among one another

have you ever loved someone so much that murder can be a favour?

i took +/- 3 days to complete reading this novel
*with all the classes and what not*

if i were to be asked for one word to this describe this novel
it will be "heart-wrenching"
the pact was a novel of a love story
but not a typical one
somehow, reading the novel left a deep marks in my heart on how strong and crazy love can be

before this
i've never read a novel
and later cried myself to sleep
with this one
it happened

the love chris had for emily was so strong that nothing can stop him from fulfilling his girlfriend wish
even if it meant killing her
because seeing emily in pain left chris in the same situation
he just couldnt help seeing his girlfriend hurt so much that he agreed to help her pull the trigger

but i was so much hurt on how emily decided on things
she was as though claiming that killing herself was far more important than her love for chris
she was so indulged in her own pain that she missed out what her actions would do to everyone around her particularly chris
but what can we say abour that
she's suicidal afterall

i loved how the writer arranged the plot in this novel
the "now and then" way of telling stories let us learn how relationship between chris and emily grew

there's only one thing that left me a bit unsatisfied
at the end, no one really know how emily had become so suicidal
*except the readers*
not even chris

short synopsis :

emily and chris had known each other for a lifetime
their family were neighbours and they had been inseparable until the phone calls came at 3am on a november morning
17 years old emily was shot in the head
and chris fingerprints were all over the gun
with one daughter dead
and another son charged on the count of murder
the dark journey of knowing the truth bagins

alert : this post contains an individual perception towards a thing and please be reminded that human perceptions differ among one another

Thursday, February 24, 2011

hari yang i.n.d.a.h

was wonderful

i had double dose of "d.a.t.e.s"

one with loved one
another with tweetfolks


i havent went out with him for a year until yesterday
it felt like the first date

constantly choosing what to wear
one after another

*screw me!*

it was wonderful

i never posted my date experiences in blog before
but this one seems just nice to be shared

we ate a lot
sandwiches for breakfast
then delicious for lunch
*which was not so delicious*
then cake some more after that
then donuts

we played angry birds on iPad at Machine MidValley
*realised that his iPhone screen wasnt good enough for me =D*

we watched this

it was scary
and stupid at the same time
*not as good as khurafat i guess..just fine*

then he sent me to pavilion for my next date


this one was with my tweetfolks
i missed most of the great parts
*except the gossips*
and i managed to add my rubi collection

for review of food and stuff
please refer at .qi wen.

it was a memorable day

thanks to everyone

p/s : b, miss u already =(

Monday, February 21, 2011

hari ini hari mengundi

hari ni merupakan hari

Pilihanraya Kampus

*woot woot!!*

saya rase utk sume IPTA kt malaysia ni
ke UKM je
saya pun xpasti
*malas nk amik tau sume bnde ni sbnrnye!!*

seperti biasa
saya mmg agak lampi *lambat pick-up* when it comes to things like this
so pagi td saya bgn, siap2 nk pg wad
on my way nk pg wad, lalula dpn ibnu sina
tgk ade ramai2 org pki white coat beratur
dalam hati terdetik juga
ade ape hari ni?
then pndang keliling baru perasan
banyak gile poster2 bergantungan

"oh, election hari ni"

saya pun terus je ke wad
nntila vote, malas nk beratur
lgpun tatau nk vote sape

dekat wad
perbualan semuanya dimulakan dgn cara yang hampir serupa

"kau da mengundi belum?"
"have you voted?"
"aku blum mengundi lg, kau da ke?"


to be honest,
i dont think it will change anything no matter who you voted for
*sorry ye kpd calon2 dan individu2 yg pernah pgg jwtn dlm mpp tersebut*
ini kali ketiga saya mengundi sebagai pelajar fakulti perubatan UKM
*wpun saya blum 21 =D*
tp saya xrase ianya membawa ape2 faedah
bnde ni sekadar satu tugasan
pergi beratur, then register, pastu pangkah la sape2pun kt kertas tu
padahal bkn kenal pun
sekadar tgk sekali time malam rapat umum before prk
then we are supposed to choose or not to choose them to be our leader
come on la
xrealistik lgsg
all of them janji all these sweet2 things
at the end, kne jgk byr rm3 utk pas masuk yg *in my honest opinion* nonsense
*tbe2 je emo..sorry ye..blood of a debater runs in my veins =D*

tp seriously
politic is definitely dirty
*sorry to say*
off campus ke, in campus ke
it's a fact no one can deny
last2 kte yg mengundi ni jd mangsa
might as well xpyh mengundi kan

what more to say
i've already voted
*sekadar utk cukup syarat je*
and hopefully something changes in the future
jgnla sekadar janji
and we still berada di takuk yg lama

p/s : jgn jadi org yg memungkiri janji. itu munafik namanya!

Saturday, February 19, 2011

i.have.been.BITTEN !!

ini serius
saya memang telah DIGIGIT!!

ini bukti
*gambar dinosaur tu sekadar hiasan untuk menunjukkan betapa ganasnya penggigit saya*

tetapi usah risau
bukan vampire yg gigit saya

tetapi hanyalah seorang mamat yang berumur 357 hari


mr muhammad razfan mikhail

long story short

saya tau kakak saya baru je kawin 2 bln lebih
so impossible utk dpt anak sedara yg da berumur nearly a year kn
so ini adalah ank buah abg ipar saya
*so automatically jd anak buah kakak saya dan seterusnya anak buah kami semua*
yang sgt mesra alam
dgn sesiapa sahaja yang sudi melayan dia

ini second time mikhail dtg sleepover kt umah kami kt pilah yang aman damai ni
1st time dtg dlu, my sisters were all around
so ade byk org bole jd mangsa gigitan dia

this time around
saya je yg blik
so saya jela yg jadi bahan gigitan gigi die yg baru tumbuh tu
*fyi, mikhail cuma ade 3 btg gigi kt atas and 2 btg kt bwh*
**so yg dlm gmbr gigitan tu adalah kesan gigi bawah die yg comel =D**
dari pipi, smpila ke kaki
asal ade peluang je mesti die nk gigit
tp setakat ni die cuma brjaya gigit tgn dan leher *semasa didukung* sahaja

sakit sgt bila kne gigit
tp seronok sbb dia akn gelak puas hati lepas gigit
*konon2 berjayala menyakitkan org lain*
so instead of mengelak drpd digigit
saya kadang2 purposely hulur tgn saya utk digigit

words can never do the justice
let's just see how adorable this small fellow is!!

comel kan die!! *wink*

Friday, February 18, 2011


A : saya rasa saya ni cantik pada pandangan awak. ke anggapan saya salah?

B : ntahla. xtau

*ape mksd perbualan ni?*

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

.in comparison.

i'm currently halfway through my final posting in third yr med school


looking backwards
comparing surgery and the previous posting which was obs & gynae
was like comparing earth and the sky above

here's a summary of my life

obs & gynae vs surgery

1. waking up in the morning

when i was in obs & gynae, i woke up every single day (weekends are omitted) at 530 am with tachycardia
*literally means your heart pumps more than it should per minute*
thinking about the ward rounds at 800 am and the cases i were supposed to present and the consequences of imperfect presentation

in surgery, i woke up at 800 am (slept after subuh prayer) with bilateral ptosis
*literally means both eyes simply cant be opened*
filled with laziness and slumped back on my bed

2. going to the wards

when i was in obs & gynae, i went to the wards every single day at 645 am with hope that my bed or beds was empty
or else, i had to prepare myself for the rounds
*particularly mental state!*

in surgery, i went to the wards at 900 am thinking of what should i do there

3. clinics

when i was in obs & gynae, thursday was my clinic day
so i had to went down to clinic, grabbed a n/c file (n/c stands for new case), called out the patients name, clerked, and presented to the registrar in the clinic
*if i was unlucky, scolding will be there for every point in the history i missed, in front of the patient :(*
if i were to stand and linger around the clinic without doing any clerking, just wait and see what my specialist would do

in surgery, i had only went to the clinic once
and i stand behind the specialist all the time, asking all the question i want in the world and not being scolded even if i couldnt answer the basic things

4. operation day

when i was in obs & gynae, monday was the operation day
so right after morning ward rounds, we will rushed to the obs & gynae operation theatre, changed clothes and went into the theatre watching whatever operation there were that particular day
if u was not around, names will taken :)

in surgery, i had never entered the operation theatre
and it's already week 4

5. at night

when i was in obs & gynae, i went to the wards every single night including sunday
well, i had to cover my beds for round the next morning
*we had round every morning and students are to present cases PERFECTLY*
if my beds were empty, then i need to find my friends whom covering two beds and both of them with patients
so that i can cover one of them
or else, we will get scolded for not presenting whereas your friends presenting two cases

in surgery, there's only study groups 3 times per week
and nothing else

6. weekends

when i was in obs & gynae, most of my oncall was on friday night
so i need to be in the labour room every friday from 700 pm till 700 am the next morning to conduct normal deliveries
or else, my logbook wouldnt be completely filled
and i'll fail my continuous assessment, hence failing my obs & gynae posting
and i would later spend the whole saturday covering all my lack of sleep
and sunday to be prepared for the next monday rounds
so, there's no chance at all for me to go back home during weekends

in surgery, it's already week 4
and i had been going home every weekends there was :)

life was totally different in comparing surgery with obs & gynae
not that i'm saying being in the surgical department is really free
but being a third yr med student in surgical posting
life could be so empty since there's not much you can do in it
*maybe i'm the one who's assuming it..or perhaps lazy.. =P*

obs & gynae might be really super hectic
but i missed it
it reminds me of what type of life i chose
being a doctor means sacrificing yourself towards the community
being with patients most of the time of your life

it's the path i chose
and i had to live it the way it should be lived =D

p/s : med school is might be scolded all the time, but it's just worth it =D

Tuesday, February 15, 2011


org tua ckp,

"jgn tidur lepas asar, nnti bole gila"

sekarang ni
saya rase mungkin org tua da buat kajian sebelum statement tu keluar
sbb saya juga agak kurang betul skarang memikirkan mimpi pelik saya ketika tidur pkul 5 ptg td

-kisah dalam mimpi tersebut-

my younger brother, h.a.z.i.m was actually studying engineering in unisel and insyaallah akan fly to japan in 3 years time
so mimpi ni berlaku 5 tahun akan dtg when my brother was supposed to come home from japan
*finela..nothing weird about that pun*

weird thing no 1 :

rumah my family was located exactly outside pagar landasan KLIA tu

mmg mengarut
kalau sidai baju, mmg bole kering in 3 minutes sbb haba dari kapal terbang yang landing tepi rumah kitorg
and kitorg sume possibly pekak sebab bunyi enjin kapal terbang yang korg faham2 jela brape kuat

so in my dream
my brother nk blik la ni
and flight die akan sampai within minutes je
*senang kan..xpyh nk provide one whole day nk g jemput org kt KLIA ble rumah sblh landasan je*

then tbe2 my father ckp, "kakya nnti pg amik ajim ye"

weird thing no 2 :

saya telah memanjat pagar landasan tersebut dan masuk ke dalam kawasan KLIA itu

ini mmg super mengarut
super duper mengarut
as if xde org yg jaga kawasan tu and saya bole selamba badak je panjat pagar tu

so saya pun selamat masuk ke dalam kawasan KLIA
dan nak dijadikan cerita
kapal terbang yg membawa adik saya itu pun landing

weird thing no 3 :

saya naik atas kapal terbang tersebut melalui pintu kokpit

first of all saya confuse
pilot masuk kokpit gne pintu dr dlm plane kan??
ntahla kenapa
kapal terbang tu ade pintu kokpit khas
ala-ala kapal terbang lama2 yang amelia earhart bwk dlm night at the museum 2 tu

so saya pun naik and jumpa la adik saya
so salam2, peluk2 mesra
*yela kan..da lme xjmpe*
kitorg pun nk kuarla dr dlm kapal terbang tu utk balik rumah

punyala terkejut ble tempat yg saya panjat td da kne kawal ketat
mmg da xbole la nk panjat utk balik rumah
terpaksa la guna cara konvensional
my brother xpela
die ade passport
saya ni yang bermasalah =P

so terjadila adegan kejar-mengejar antara saya dgn pegawai kt airport tu



terjaga dari tidur
nasib baik sebab da xlarat nk lari da sbnrnye time tu

pusing kanan
pusing kiri
masih selamat di atas katil

tgk jam da pkul 545
solat asar xbuat lagi
saya pun duduk la sekejap
terlintas dalam hati
apasalla mimpi extreme mcm tu skali


p/s : elakkan tidur lepas asar..mimpi mengarut je nnti *wink*

..salji di kuala lumpur..

bertenang ye semua
tajuk itu sekadar propaganda sahaja

dlm masa 1 mggu ni belakangan ni
ble bukak fb je mesti nmpk gmbar manusia bermain salji
sepcifically kawan2 saya di negara 4 musim yg kebetulan salji sedang turun

saya pun pandang langit
"bila la salji nk turun kt kuala lumpur ni"

merepek je sebenarnya
tp wonder jgk
ape org buat ek first time jmpe salji??
yela kn
xpernah nk merasa
setakat hujan lebat sampai banjir tu adalah kt malaysia oh tanah airku ni
*yg da merasa salji pendapat anda dialu2kn okeh*
**salji yg real je..kalau merasa salji kt genting tu xperlu sbb saya pun da rasa**

rase seronok tgk org main salji
kite kt sini nk main ujan mak marah
takut demam
so main ngan cahaya matahari jela
tp takut hitam pulak
macam-macam kerenah

manusia ni *specifically saya* kadang2 sxreti nk bersyukur
tapi ble fkir2 blik
bknnye xbersyukur
cuma curious je
dari zaman sekolah2 pasang impian nk main salji kt negara org
skali xde rezeki nk g blaja jauh2
dulu mesti sedih ble tgk gmbr kawan2 fly merata dunia
skarang ni da xde perasaan da
haha..seriously, itu bahagian kalian
rezeki saya di bumi malaysia ni
tuhan tahu ape yg terbaik utk kita wpun kita kadang2 xpuas hati dgn pilihan tuhan
kene belajar redha
*emosi la pulak suddenly :))*

mungkin belum rezeki la kot nk merasa pgg salji tu
kalau da gian sgt, saya ade cadangan

"bole cuba duduk depan peti ais yg terbuka smbil mintk kwn taburkn ice blended atas kepala"

p/s : post merepek..maaf =D

Monday, February 14, 2011

heated .z.r.c.

these days
saya sgt malas post blog
but then this issue seemed to be so out of control
and i think i want to put some of my thinking into it
it wont be proper kalau saya post kt blog BBA or the chatbox
i would just like to put in word in my own space

i was at home when i was told that the ZRC sketch thingy had been cancelled
two days prior to that
saya dan siti were brainstorming of plots and characters since we were given task to handle this sketch thingy for our posting
*currently surgery*
so i wonderla jgk
why all of a sudden cancelled
even though before that mmg byk suara2 yg tidak bersetuju dgn program trsebut

i forgot about it until i came back to cheras yesterday

saya tanya siti, "asal tetibe cancel sketch tu?"
siti jawab, "eh nad..kau xde bace ke ape jd kt chatbox bba tu..kecoh!"
saya sambung, " yeke..xde pulak tgk..xpela..nnti kte tgkla ble free"

so mlm smlm, i browse la blog bba tersebut
little did i know
mcm perang ape je kt chatbox tu
cube bygkn
chatbox yg kecik, penuh dgn komen2 panas yg kalau tidak dikawal bole menyebabkan chatbox tu overheated

so i read one after another
and i came with one conclusion

manusia memang suka complain
segala benda kt dunia ni yg xkene dgn rasa hati je, mesti complain
and yg kurg baiknya
kebanyakan complain tu sgt pesimis
*maaf ye kalau ade mana-mana pihak yang terasa*
**siapa makan cili, awakla yg rasa pedas =D**

beberapa perkara yang ingin saya komen :

1. yang memberi komen xbgtahu siapa dia pun

so sape2 yg bukak blog bba sure tahu chatbox tu penuh dgn anonymous
yg gne nama guest je da tatau da org yg sme ke x
kalau ikhlas nk komen sesuatu, then xpyh takut2
bgtaula awk tu siapa
so senangla nk bg feedback
ni kalau nk bg feedback dkt guest
confuse nk bg kt guest yg mane satu sbb terlalu ramai
lgpun peribahasa ada menyebut
berani kerana benar, takut kerana salah
so jgn takut nk ltk nama korg kt chatbox tu ble nk ckp smthing
kan lbih appropriate bile ltk nama

2. terlalu byk complaint yg menjatuhkn

as i read through the chatbox
terlintas dlm hati
byknye complaint manusia sorg ni
sungguh tidak optimistic sekali
i'm not saying that iam so positive thinking
it's just that seeing korg buat komen mcm tu
as if mcmla sia2 sgt ape yg zrc plan utk kite
senang je buat conclusion bnde tu xkn bg ape2 impak positif
are u sure assumption korg tu btul?
kalau ye pun korg rase mcm tu, jgnla komen smpi menjatuhkn org lain
try put yourself in their place
then you'll learn how to criticise others

3. hanya tahu complaint sahaja

ini obvious
saya igt lg time pg agm persiap
siang ade bukak cadangan kt sume org tntang program ape yg korg nk dlm zrc
as far as i remember
xde sape2pun dr kalangan kita cadangkn ape2
so knape mesti complain beria2 sekarang
bknnye korg je yg kne join bnde ni
all of us kene

i find this sketch thingy menyusahkan time mula2 dpt tau
tp buat ape nk pening2, nk stress
just take things easily
just sketch ringkas
bkn die mintk kte buat pementasan teater pun
korg sgt overreacted in my opinion

rase kelakar ble post bnde mcm ni
and realise yg kite sume da besar
da bole mengundi pun
tp still sume mcm kanak2 ribena

think deep before you said something
and consider others
dunia ni bukan untuk seseorang individu semata

p/s : i am writing this post sebagai seorang pelajar dlm batch kita ni
bukan nk menyebelahi sesiapa okeh!